FM static..!!

go listen to fm static...

:)

My extended family...

My family made me who I am… I love my family.. I know for sure…
But then these angels..add on to life… a little thank you note for a family god forgot giving me… yet fate ensured was meant to be


I close my eyes..!!
And block that noise…
No.. the monster’s are out..
He who shouldn’t be named is long gone..
And all the jerks gone too…
There’s no wolf between me and you…

Feels like I am feeling the unheard …
Feeling blown out by winds of unseen…
No voids left.. sorrows seem like they’ve never been…
Everything’s perfect.. Every hue in the correct place…
Those so-called crayons of life.. humbug..!! don’t need your grey streaks..
Just three little piggies and 3 stars to add on…

In no specific order…
I love you all more than anyone else can ever..
And I love it when you scold me for not keeping well…
And when you promise the wolf’s going to hell…
I love it when you correct my jinxed up pronunciations…
And also when you get irritated trying your best not to show..that I am damaged..

And continue this list…
I love you for who you are..and who you’ve made me..
I love it when you sweetheart me when tears come knocking around…
And call them jerks.. those who do not love me…
And I love it when you wake through nights…
Listening to me cry about jerks to teaching me chemistry and maths in graveyard hours..!!

You complete me…
And I love you cause in you I see myself..and hate the fact to core
You’ve been here..listening me curse your very own brother..
And you’ve tried gifting me laughs in the weirdest silly ways…
And you’ve stuck on even after all those insults even on your birthday...
And yet you kept quiet..hiding you pain cause you had to protect me.. and lovedme when I was as silly..as silly can be…

You’ve come now… just entered with a bang…
And I love you for your simple way of life and smile…
And I love your promise of walking beyond the very last mile…
And I love your monster theory..your goodnight chuckle..your shining eyes…
I love your promised future.. I love your idea of our special paradise..
And I love the fact of my need to protect you and be protected by your kiddish guard…

You’ve been here.. without a word all these years…
And I love you..cuase you still stand here..even after all that’s changed…
And I love you cuase you just simply know my needs…
And I love you when you know I won’t ever do anything for you…and yet you never stop expecting…
And I love your tear when for me it sheds…that little rascal gets me back to you piercing through each doubt…
And I love the fear I have of you going away.. and the silent prayer that I get you back like the good ol’ times…

You are my angel.. and there are many more.. who just stay around…
There is one who calls me up when he writes new stuff…
And somehow I know he won’t stay forever..
Yet I love it when he just is unfair to others… like a part of me…

And there’s another one…who just came in recently and went even fast…
I was shocked of how she knew everything about me.. like she had been always there silently…
And I don’t even know why was she here…
Yet I shared a lot… like it was all meant to be this way…

And then the cute new ones.. those who meet me in the school..
and those who spend those little moments with me..when they just somehow bring in warmth...
and then the people.. i never knew i'd ever meet..yet grow so close..
with silly little things connecting us...
And orkut requests of.. “didi I dnt think u knw me..but I knw you”
I love all of you.. cause I dunno why..and I dunno how…
But the scars seem to heal forever now…

The beauty salon...

In the beauty salon…

An uncanny smell of strong ‘sweet’ smell overpowers, eyes bewildered by sudden pink shine
I enter the world forbidden for creatures from species like mine…

The front desk has some lilies, some daffodils and some other stuff with weird names…
And yellow-pink-purple hair display with alien fashionista proclaims …

I wonder..i shiver and I pause my walk..as I enter fighting the nauseating aura..
The front desk has usual pretty Preeti sitting,I request a hair do feeling sinned as some box-less Pandora..

Sure little lady, I’ll ask someone to help you with the options…
We have street cuts,slanted edges..and actually designs to suit the changing seasons…

Seasons..i wonder.. so you blonde em for autumn and bleach em for winter…
Little flowers for the spring and maybe bald-heads for summer…

She smiles.. she thinks.. I was joking all this while…
I am dead serious brethren.. ask her not to SMILE..!!

I gather some courage.. and with all my strength…
With faked surety I pronounce…I err.. I just thought you’d clip em off along the length..

Shocked and disgusted she glares at the alien me…
The stunned stare as if I spilled some soda on the sacred fashion prophecy..

The friendly tone gone.. I no longer was welcomed it seemed…
So we’ll trim em up the ol’ plain way.. she said as her eyes screened…

Maybe her pink dress..suddenly realised my flip-flops,shorts and sports tee..
And her Gucci didn’t actually like my Tommy Hilfiger...or maybe the complete me..!!

SO OH MY GOD..!! was I the satan of the utopian fairy salon…
I slogged behind the pacing her…was I still a human or some over-fried Kentucky bacon..?

Grab that seat ma’am.. our best will soon be here…
‘you’ll learn a new leasson’.. was all I could decipher from that stare…

A French little man.. so longer than me came in soon…
And the pleasant company proved out to be my little boon…

He suggested me some bounced up hair do.. and explained the pro-con…
I was a game for it.. do me any cut except the famous.. ‘dead mower and lawn’((Yeah that rockstar thingy with little spikes in the very middle))

So whatever..it took him some 7 clips and 9 snips and I was told I am done…
A hug and a 1000 bucks.. and I jumped of the chair.. maybe to never return…


But now I wonder.. of who was responsible for these beauty salons..!!
The mail chauvinistic society...you...me… or some extra-terrestrial con.. ?

Whatever it is.. it has to be evil…for the pain of a full body wax beats army boots..
Don’t you dare disagree…
IT IS BOILING WAX..HUMAN SKIN AND HAIR PULLED OFF FROM ROOTS..


((my try at light stuff.. i knw the rhymes get irritating..sing-song ding-dong.. but lol.. it is my sad try at comedy..))

love you angel... :)

A new found angel…


I have had the most wonderful friends one can actually dream of.. my girlfriends my most precious gems.. and after all those differences and voids that we sometimes we feel we will never be able to win over.. I just some how know we are meant to be together forever.. like my angel once said.. even if we hate each other to the core one fine day.. let us never lose each other… and angel.. trust me I pray.. we girlfriends never lose each other.. cause if we do.. I know I’ll lose myself

But this one’s for my most recently discovered angel.. and woo-hoo.. finally a GUY in the angel list.. I hardly have known him for 15 days now.. but boy do I love you..!! yes ofcourse I do..
And after all that you told me yesterday.. I respect you even more than I love you…
Yes I know maybe I am trusting too fast.. or maybe I am not even giving myself time to judge you as a person.. but know what.. I am so not interested in doing that.. I just declare that you are my personal angel now.. and boo-hoo.. even you got no right to get out of this pact.. you are caught together forever angel..!!

And pata hey.. you actually are sooo darn cute that you indeed know how influential you are.. and lol.. do you misuse it to your advantage..!! yes you soooooooo do..!! like yesterday you actually made me happy forever..!! I mean I finally get all the crap out of my head.. my girlfriends would be sooo happy..!! all cause of you.., and damn me.. I am so darn excited about professing my love for my new found angel.. that I have absolutely no words to describe the very reason I am writing this..

This one is for an angel is just met..
The cutest support I’ve ever had…
Maybe the warmest feeling I could feel…
I pinch myself hard.. not sure if you’re real…

My words prove how happy I am..
Writing like a 4th grader..look at all these rhymes…
I wish I could hug you reallllyyy reaalllyyy haaarrrddd…
And thump you hard on your forehead when you dare be sad…

Boo you ..you dhakkan..
You got no right to be this irresistibly adorable…
Hardly 2 weeks..when you came in with a bang…
But now that you’re here…it is impossible not holding you hand…

A kiss on the forehead…
A pact for you and me…
Just a little not to share… we will be till and after eternity


This one’s for a pure little heart…
This one’s for a beautiful start…
This one’s for a special little lover…
This one’s for my kid brother…


Shut me up someone.. It’s just that I love this new dhakkan ALOK THE MAGICIAN… this if for you and love you dhakkan… promise..ab tuney didi manna hey toh tu dekh kiddo.. I am never leaving you.. tu try bhee karke dekhna… I have never ever met someone as adorable as you are..and tee-hhee..i am not letting go you go…
Aladdin (there you go.. your nickname now on..!!)



and lol..waise toh tu chota hey..par teri baatey.. aur tu hee mera khaayal rakhta hey na.. isiliye.. :p

just a happy day... :p

nerdy me at the office.. :p

( p.s this post is actually one of the most pointless(and grammatically handicapped) ones I’v ever come up with.. it isn’t even a proper account of the day..missing so many details.. but..lol.. I was happy for a day..isn’t that good enough a reason for this post to be here…
24th September 2009…

Ok.. I really have to write about the wonderful day for I just haven’t had a better..’all-smiles’ day for I dunno how long now... seems like angels just took extra care of me for the entire darn day..

Ok..so first of all.. one of my so-called good friends did his BEST to spoil it for the rest of us.. and hell yeah.. I am tired of the wannabe ways of most of the people here.. maybe it’s just me who feels so..but there’s this race of masked identities and veiled personalities everywhere.. feels stupid and feels strange.. I mean.. I really really hope I am not someone I am not.. ((losing the point.. am i.. :p ))…

Ok..jo bhee hey.. toh now that we had our share of idiots till around 23th ka midnight.. we are GREATFUL to Harshit verma for stepping in at the last moment and saving the day for us.. also Aditi who actually got all this ready and Dev who played another important role in making 24th one of the happiest days of my life...

Pehley toh.. we were alreasy ek ghanta late..lol..and then driver bhaiya lost his sense of direction in one of the most irritating ways possible accompanied by his conatant cribbing.. lol..and yet having Aditi and Harshit with me.. acted like a tranquiliser to the antire pressure cooker of a situation..finally we reached Dev’s place..and lol..then it took some 20 minutes to talk him into wearing a uniform…and lol.. then a lot of gossips till we reached n.c.e.r.t ka office made the trip wonderful…

Reaching the studio..we were actually nervous..and lol..also scared of who actually were we supposed to interview.. all that I could decipher was..WE WERE MEETING MAHARASHTRA’S MEDICAL TOPPERS..!! scary enough for me..
So expecting an army of nerds with tael and badey waaley chasmey…we were in for a pleasant surprise to meet the guys… and
NEWS FLASH… ALL FOUR OF EM WERE NORMAL HOMO SAPIENS.. no mutant ninjas..!!

Boy..were they fun to hang out with. It was just awesome interacting with all four of them…especially knowing that they were one of the best our nation has..and yet were so down to earth..!!

The interview was nice.. PANCAKE.. lol.. yes we all had to get some strange white powder applied on our faces and we all wondered if we could call payal mam and shout…MAM WE’VE GOT PANCAKES.. GET SOME POETS..!!

Never been this nervous in my life.. ok..would be lying if I say this… cause being honest.. we really didn’t realise we had cameras ogling at us ..ofcourse DADA YEH KYAA KAR RAHEY HO…wala shouts would re-instill their presence …and then CUT..WAHI SEY DUBARA LO..!! would have us all staring at each other and giggling.. OK SIR…
Lol..Harshit’s intro was hilarious.. it was like.. he introduced himself…and then the lady in charge asked him to smile a little…so they took the shot again..and lmao..!! verma gave the widest possible grin..!! HEY I AM HARSHIT VERMA FROM BLUE BELLS..!! as soon as we heard the next cut.. lol.. almost each one of us had a chorus.. “ITNA KHUSH HARSHIT BHAI..!!”…lol..Dev looked like a chicken on a slaughter table when he first spoke.. lol..and Aditi.. uugghh excuse me..i just wanted to askkkk… lol.. whenver adi would speak.. all of us would be transported into a parenting show.. with her nice low pitched voice..

The topper guys were flawless in the show..and as we nicely played our part of quietly nodding our heads while they spoke.. they handled everything perfectly with some beautiful expressions and impressive use of quotes thrown in between their stories and suggestions..

The shooting went well..and then the guys even joined us to ronald’s place ..lol.. and I was actually impressed when they used all the possible combos available at mc’d (( an excellent application of brains in practical life ))… and lol.. ride 15mts ride back to n.c.e.r.t too had it’s own fair share of action.. and saying goodbyes was actually sad.. but lol.. we continued their nice little argument on the Indian government… with Dev and Harshit almost ready to slay me whenever I’d say INDIA IS A POOR NATION (which it sadly is..but acceptance is the first step before action..isn’t it..?? )

Lol..dropping Dev..and getting down at my place… Aditi and Harshit were dropped by driver bhaiya... so that all of us could catch our respective tuitions..lol..

Came back home… harvested my grapes at Farmville.. (psstt.. I got the biggest possible farm :p ) I was actually shhooo happy that I sat down and enjoyed..physics for some non-stop 4 hours till my eyes closed and refused any further co-operation…

I mean.. just dunno.. how this perfectly ordinary day proved to be one of the happiest lately… (c’mon even a debate at CCA has more tension and action than the entire day)
And special in I dunno what sense yet special ( I mean Lucknow each day was a challenge..but this day was just sooo regular in each possible sense )
And still when I woke up the next day.. I wanted to go back and re-live 24th September once again…
Just maybe to decipher the conundrum.. solve this silly enigma.. of why was I so happy the entire day..!!



the topper log from mumbai

Masked identity…

How many times in life have you wondered…

Of who you actually are… of why are you who you are…and how would it feel if you get to end it all…

Well…being honest… we all tag those black-clad pierced gothic looking people…EMO…
But try and introspect the true you… a little glance and you’ll realize how each one of us live through the weak moments..our own layer of black… shielding us from some made-up pain… or maybe..some true storm…

It is all in the mind they say… pain..anxiety…loss…happiness…love… all of it..

See I had this wonderful friend… who died one fine day…and as shameful as it could get…I never even noticed her death… so here is a little tribute to the friend I lost…

She was this little girl..as I remember her… always giggling about absolutely nothing… she lived in this make believe world..and actually sang bob the builder as she worked on her homework… everything was…KARKEY DIKHAGEY.. HAAN BHAI HAAN…!!!

She loved animals… not because she was into charity…but just cause she could express her true self to them… she was really special…
Not a great student..maybe.. but a great human being…
And lol..!! did she cry…yes…she did..and infact..she would howl on the smallest of deeds…she’d talk to her teddy bears..and she’d talk to the plants outside…would dance in the rains..would do everything wrong..and then cry… : )

But then..she died..
I dunno when… I still cannot decipher why… but she just died… and uncanny as it seems…I haven’t even found her corpse yet…

She lived real close…
Somewhere inside me….

But I couldn’t even realize a howling her when she needed me the most… I couldn’t even be a mute spectator… I just wasn’t there…

I dunno… I got to achieve a lot… maybe..lost even more… but even she had all I have now..
As far as I remember…she was the head girl too… with a junior tag ofcourse… but her first step was opening a green house…
Well my first initiative… punishing students..getting discipline…

Not that discipline isn’t important…but hey..!! how and when did I become so correct…?
What happened to doing everything wrong…?

Well…I remember a speech by this friend…
‘bahut saara kaam..and no aaraam… ney jack ko dull boy bana diya…’
Ofcourse she lost the competition… but her principal stood up and hugged her real hard…she hadn’t ever met someone so ‘unadulterated’…

The last speech I gave…
‘Love and friendship are nothing but shackles in the marathon of self-development’
Ofcourse…I won… and not only did I win… but the director of debate team of delhi university gave me her own honorary shield… she hadn’t met a better ‘orator’….

More over… I remember my friend getting ready for school…
Around 40 minutes in the wash room…
And 40minutes getting her socks perfected… how she hated those strings of thread in the inside of the socks… each day she’d cut a pair of socks..each day her folks had to get her new socks…. ‘mere anguthey mey yeh lagta hey…skin ko dekho.. red red kar deta hey..’
She was always late… but was let in..cause punishing her would mean a howling little brat for the entire day…

Me.. well I wake up around 30 minutes from the time of school… get ready in some 10 minutes… and then zoop off to school…
I am always late… but am let in… cause I am in the council…


Result day would mean her dancing on securing the 21st rank…
Result day for me …means nagging on how they are unfair to cut 3 marks… and how I lost a rank…

She’d win awards for the best clown in the troop….by artoons fun club…
I have been the best student in india for four years… by times of India group…

She’d wish to be a C.I.D officer… even sported bob cut from this little patri market saloon … to look like the baldy from the sony television flick…
I am deciding between engg. And journalism… and I sport the latest street cut with lager edges from my hairstylist from lakme chains..

She’d hug the school bus conductor…
I do not talk to friends when I am not in the ‘mood’…

She was herself…all times…all seasons…
I do not know how to define myself…


She was wrong…she didn’t care…
I am wrong…I am right… I am unsure…



She was human….
I am a mask…

She’s lost…
I can never be established….

She’s dead…
I can never live…

my collection....

Lyrics | Please Don't Stop The Rain lyrics

Song lyrics | Almost Lover lyrics

Song lyrics |
href="http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/p/pink/please_dont_leave_me.html" target="_blank">Please Don't Leave Me lyrics

Song lyrics | Painted On My Heart lyrics

Song lyrics | Underneath Your Clothes lyrics

Pink — Please Don't Leave Me lyrics | Lyricsty.com

this is a part of the collection i could publish right now...there are many more wonderful songs i'd like to share... duh-uh i dunno why..but i am just doing it :p...

i am sure u may have most of em...but agar nahi hey... toh yahan sey le lo...

and yeah... keep smiling..and please please...take care all you smoochies cocoa beans... :)

pointless... :P

Me versus the world

yeah yeah..do not worry I am not on some vs fetish.. it’s just that I really have wondered about this one for quite some time now..


It was our first day at Narayana, kalu sarai … our class had to shoot off at around 10 am… yeah or maybe 8..ok how does that even matter… :p
Now I was like ok… I can do this… I still remember.. I was like really excited… and aditi and I almost hopped till our class…
And bhai sahib..jab waahan jaker bethey toh we were stunned… aas paas all we could see were monsters double our size… the girls almost looked plastic and were like ok..sexy..!! but dude, looked double our age..or shall I say..we looked half of all of em…

I just clutched adi’s hand real hard…and tabhi there was this huge guy joh hamare peechey aakey betha… so I just turned and asked… “aap kaunsi class mey ho”…he was like… “just gave mah 10th”… I was like…”you sure…cuz you look double me”..lol..few giggles and I realized there is something horrible wrong with the place… (( no no..not the guys and girls..but the education thingy… got no word.. no single word in my bheja…))

So got shifted to Gurgaon branch… yes we had a lot of ex-bluebellians in here… but I dunno why were they acting strangely…maybe cuz we were of different divisions…or whatver… but I made some real cool friends there..and yes was understanding better… still things again didn’t work cuz I really couldn’t get their system… so yeah… wasting dad’s lakh… I took back my name…

Now…why the f did I narrate this incident… well.. to highlight my mini size… yes I am 5’2… but then that’s like the average height for girls in our nation… but still… whenever I come across people.. they always take me for a seventh standard chum… even kids in our school… I was scolding this little kid.. and said.. I’ll take your prefect badge… he was like… “aap mera kyu logey…aapkey paas class monitor ka hey toh”,…. I was like SHOCKED… lol…. I reacted in a even dhakkan way… snatching his badge and saying… ‘dude I am the head girl… h-e-a-d girl…go get you abc’s rectified”… lol…ok..fir sey out of line…(hey though that very day I realized, I have nobody to stand with me, all these ‘friends’ they are mere spectator…chalo better late than never…)

Still..back to the kiddo me… abhi recently we had gone to sree ram school aravli for a competion.. and there was this kid.. who was acting real coy..(brought to my notice by aditi jain… ahem ahem ) ..all the while he kept smiling an almost standing when I gave an answer… I was like ok ok..niki.. just another regular perv..do not worry… then the guy is asked a question..he stands up and says…”mey kaksha navum mey hu”… I was like BAZOOKED…..lol.. the very next question thrown upon me..had me actually almost shouting…”mey nikita Tanwar, barvi kaksha mey aatey aatey mey bas itna hee janna hey….”… lol.. aditi and my bhai actually find this incident funny… but then a ninth standard guy… euwwww……

And to add on… my sleeping with teddy bears… when this news leaked out… I had my friends..rolling on the floors… but dude… everybody needs a beary hug when they sleep… it’s just that some people hide their feelings..and some do not…

All these competions.. I am guided towards the junior wings… and when told no damn I am in 12th..they are like.. oohh kkk.. you look cute.. (though their eyes say something else)… moreover.. people say my voice is really mature and that of a lady in 30’s… so does this mean I am jinxed person… !!!



No.. I am all pointless in this blog… so I am shutting myself… just tell me… do you think I am a kid… ?? I mean yes I am a kid.. but lol.. do you think am a kid even in front of a kid my age….

Phew……!!!

Authors vs Writers... (haha... agar length dekhney ke baad bhee tumney padh liya toh tum mahaan ho yaara )

Authors vs Writers….


Before I start , I may as well apologize before hand because even though most of my lovely readers here do not give a damn to literature and any book without ‘pictures’, I am afraid if any of you is offended by the authors I am going to name in here.
Whatever you will read now, is my personal opinion and for me it is nothing but absolute truth and in no way do I hope or wish it to be the same for you.

A writing belongs more to the reader than it can ever to the writer, because though the corpse is brought forward by the pen, it is the heart reading it that pours in life


I was going through The speaking tree edition-4 by Times of India when I came across a wonderful write by an anonymous and though I couldn’t remember the original work word by word there was something that did strike me and of all that I could comprehend , I have put in the lines preceding this in italics.

Wonderful isn’t it , I can write about water, you can decipher it as mirror and then express it further as some pure naïve soul… like they say there’s just one simple rule to follow when you write or read … and that is.. ‘follow nothing..follow noone’
Because here we aren’t talking about logarithms with fixed values and set of rules to follow… here we aren’t even relating the radius of earth to the relative motion of moon, but here we are tearing a piece of our soul and then using each possible drop of the flowing blood to find ourself in someone else’s words or for that matter our own words.

Being the member of the worlds largest forum for rant practitioners I realize how the greatest of writersnever get published in hard covers…not because they aren’t accepted but because they prefer not naming themselves as the owner of a write. They realize , no mortal can ever actually own words…

Last night, I finally picked up the book I was planning to read for months now but somehow couldn’t even complete the foreword.
So finally when I dimmed the lights of my room and picked up the book The games Indians play – why are we the way we are .. I was left gasping for air after some 32 pages. With tremendous respect for Mr. V. Raghunathan , I am sorry but the sudden Aila like blows of strange names and stranger situations left me actually numb..the only part left active in my cranium box asking why the hell is this the way it is …yes yes.. an arrogant remark by someone who still cannot differentiate between being-bieng , but then there was something very uncomfortable about reading the work. It somehow had all the required questions but absolutely no answers anywhere… and going by the Chinese philosophy of perception of empty spaces this could have been a really big positive for the author had he constantly not gone into the game theory details and then even filling up each empty space with some certain methodology of his own.
Yes.. he is the one who gave birth to the work..and he has each and every right possible to pen down whatever he wishes to so I guess it’s just that I as a reader couldn’t connect with him or for me I would say I failed connecting with his soul, but then still gasping for air I wonder did the author actually need my soul..?

Pick up any book..by some famous author and then be ready for some 15 pages of expert comments by hundreds of unknowns explaining or rather convincing you …of how not reading further would spell doom not only for you but for the entire human race .

And now the point of my bringing forth this point… as I look around I see thousands of wonderful drafts in hundreds of blogs I read and then I see some expert works by great authors … and I realize how the rebellion in our society is slowly failing in front of the systemized carcass-like Mr. Perfect .

Some comments which actually bother the reader in me are somewhat like…

I would give this a 5.678900
You’re writing disappointed me … spellings ruined the entire fun..it lost the essence of being a write…
I expectedmuch more
The story would have been better if the ending had the girl dying

I mean have you ever told your mom… I do appreciate the effort you made when you carried me in your womb for 9 months but still I would have appreciated if you had given me birth in august, cause then I would be a leo..
Or maybe went over to a friend’s place and told his dad… I loved your choice of your wife..especially her hair but still your kids…hmm… I expected much more from a handsome couple of your like..but still I give u a 3.78

And then sadly I even see young writers changing their style of work and apologizing for what they wrote… the whole thing disgusting me… for I as a human would never apologise for what I dreamt..and my writings for me …are my dreams…

I dunno… comments yes they do mean you expressing what you feel… but then EXPRESS WHAT YOU FEEL….

Like I’d like to give this wonderful example of one of my writer friends...
I had sent over a draft to her and asked her of what she felt…

Her reply was this one line…

Niki…I honestly couldn’t read it, cause it was all in caps ..made me feel hated..

And know what… I had written it in a spur of immense hatred…and even though it was a professional write… I could relate to the hatred flowing through it…and the very fact that she could feel what I felt while penning it down..well over-whelmed me beyond limits…



Ending it all… I would leave it to you… of whether I am a writer or an author…I still am not sure… but all I can do is appeal to all of you….be a reader and not a witness…comprehend...rebel…and be the writer of your own soul…authors..we have many of them sitting in expert-rooms….we need more souls who feel…we need you…



My candle burns at both ends...It will not last the night...
But ah my foes and oh my friends...
It gives a lovely light...

Dedicated to the only true writer I have ever felt...and no one else has ever even touched the emotions his simple writings aroused in me… dedicated to- Sir Roald Dahl…




Ask me to name writers..i would say Roald Dahl..Vikram Seth…Sylvia Plath..Paula Danziger …and your eyes…

OINKY DOREE....

Oinky doree..oinky oik…
Mr. Pig’s out for a walk…

Oinky doree… oinky dum….
Mr. Pig spots favourite rum…

Oinky doree… oinky hore….
Mr. Pig asks for more…

Oinky doree..oinky dey…
Mr. Pig calls it a day…

Oinky doree…oinky lome..
Mr. Pig heads for home…

Oinky doree..oinky thag…
Some one steals Mr. Pig’s bag…


Oinky doree…oinky hack…
Will someone please bring it back…

((i wrote this rhyme..yeaahh... oink oink..pigs rule ))

vishu bhaiya... :)

A new beginning….

Woo-hoo… just back from my bhai’s sagai… and wooww… it was FANTABULOUS… as was obivious…my bhaiya was the GADAR GUY….bhabhi jee was looking chooo chweet… and hee haaa… since I missed gullu bhaiya’s shaadi… I made a point not to leave vishu bhaiya alone this time…

My formative years were spent with most of my bhais… but taru and vishu bhaiya and I were in the same house so lol… the equations changed into we being really close… i love all my bhaiyaaasss… ashu bhaiya being my favourite hanging out buddy…gittu bhaiya being my favourite prankster bhai… munjal bhaiya being the masti party …taru bhai… being my closest supporter …lovey-rishi being my cute same age brothers…and chotu…being the chamakta sitara… but right now… I will talk about vishu bhaiya…

Well… vishu bhaiya…hmm..how do we put it… the only person in the family to have ever slapped me…. And then shower me with chocolates cuz he was sorry :p ..haha… just a call away..sach mey … for the world we are states away… and cousins… but for me..you are someone I’ve always looked up to…someone I wish to be like… someone who’s just awesome and made me who I am…who taught me the basic manners of closing my mouth while eating and then would wake up at around 5 am to ensure that I brush properly…yes… almost all my friends have a crush on bhaiya… and I remember when he would drop me to school… girls would be like.. ‘can you please introduce us to him’… even though I was this possessive behen and would shoo off all those dhakkans… our night rides on his pulsar….and then his sending me doggie from cochin..(which still hasn’t reached…kill th courier people)… we have so many special memories to share…

You have been there always… understanding my tears… and then warding off all the pain I faced… I just wish to let you know… you’re special bhai… and yes.. bhabhi is really cute… and I wish for a wonderful future for the both of you….

I couldnt stop adding on.. so i had to hit the darn publish button before my fingers committed suicide

MERA BHAI


NIKI... :) (5/26/2009 2:49:01 PM): btw..am lost
NIKI... :) (5/26/2009 2:49:06 PM): blog kya likhu
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manu bhaiya (5/26/2009 2:50:09 PM): kabh tak check kru
NIKI... :) (5/26/2009 2:50:30 PM): 30 mts
manu bhaiya (5/26/2009 2:50:41 PM): meters??/
manu bhaiya (5/26/2009 2:50:56 PM): wht happnd 2 u metrics??/

So… before I started yapping about my life’s bestest buddy…. I thought you guys should kinda know him.. hey naaa…

Born some 5 years before me… bhai’s… hmm.. the bestest.. lol ..ok.. I know… bestest is no word (psstt… as one of our teachers would put it… NIKITA TANWAR… BESTEST IS NO WORD…YOU’RE WORSE THAN A 3RD GRADER.. aww..cmon.. you know who…:p )

Hmm… so first..something I wrote for bhai… long long back.. ((eeuww.. he has no idea.. mush mush… we rajputs hate it.. but still.. bhai bear it peaze ;) ))

Opened my eyes… saw you STARING ….
They say.. I would always copy you in everything….

Oh did I bhai…?
Tell me.. was I this irritating idiotic tail..following you like you shadow….
Naah naah… am no shadow… am just you…

Mumma tells me… you were always there….
Hugging me… playing with me… and protecting me …

Yes… she tells me… you’de dress me up as a little sardar…
And I know I lose my flow here.. but he’d stuff my juddi with tamatar….

And of all the barbies we’d burn and cremate …
Brother… mettel people should sue you forever….

And yes… our little castles for ants in the garden…
And then having buso crushing it… brother you remember it.. right ?

Lol.. we were this diabolic pair…
Born evil… remember… we’d steal diesel from the garage generator….

Haha.. mummy would blame some unknown DIESEL CHOR…
While..we’de be up on the terrace… burning another Barbie…

And bhaiya… you remember those ultra-expensive german toys dad would bring…
Nobody knows… they still might be buried in that water boring dug…

And yes… our fired polymers… wat would you call em… AGNI MISSILE….
Some nuclear weapon.. haha.. burning polythene bags… and yes once again..BARBIE OMELATE…

And yes… bhai… mum tells me.. I’de gillafy your clothes…and you would never mind….
And haha.. how you’de make me sit on a tri-cycle..and BOOM..ACCIDENT… lol..

Not forgetting… how I would tear off your hair…
And you would dislocate my shoulder… bhai… WWE… swatcats… and what not….

They say.. I would always copy you…
But are they blind…

Ask them to open there eyes and see… I still do… eee haaa…stop me if you can


So shoot out bhai…
Tell me.. am I this irritating idiotic tail..following you like you shadow….
Naah naah… am no shadow… am just you…


OOHHHKK… SOORRRYYY FOR THE MUSH… but bhai… I wrote this… maybe in class 6th… yeah… tabhi… I wanted to give this to you for christmas… but lol.. I made a card instead… I dunno… look at the lol’s.. ee haa… :p…

I guess I dunno… it’s cool..that I am actually writing about you… but hey promise me this will not change our HATE-EQUATION….
Me misusing your password and teasing girls… and yes… leaking your secrets… esp… aww.. you know wat.. (( duniya mey… logo ko..dhauka kabhi ho jaataa…))

I dunno.. how can you actually be this perfect.. how can you actually remember getting me chocolates everytime you come home … even if it’s at 3 am… and how can you go bankrupt getting me all the possible Punjab’s team merchandise… how can you make me shut up…and listen to you scoldings… and how can you hear me screaming… how can you dress up as a girl to make me laugh and how can you make Africa-like chappaties at around 4am so that I do not disturb mom…. How can you so very easily own up those mistakes… all of them committed by me.. yet never let anyone know…. And how can you get me vegetarian curry for karim’s kebab..and yes… those hour long drives for me and jack…even when you know I am going to put all the blame on you… taking me out to malls… just cause I wanna go no matter if you have fever…and eating whatever I bake…even if it has 8 table spoons of soya sauce… and dumping trash-bin on me… just to make me bathe and stealing my collectible pictures and putting em up on your orkut profile… and then never changing ur password despite me teasing girls all over the globe with your special id……omg… bhai..… stop me…I guess.. I am getting to damn mushy ((not Rajput like..uh huh :P)

Know what bhai… you’re beyond my deciphering capabilities
Just cause… you no human… you’re my angel… just mine.. forever… : )


Pata hey.. my friends say.. you’re the coolest bhai they’ve ever seen.. and even though I show am disgusted… bhai… just want you to know… you aren’t just the coolest… but the cooooolestest (( CALL THAT TEACH… LMAO ))….

Bhai… I dunno.. I feel like killing myself for posting this.. I just can’t have you know.. I love you.. but uaawwnn… I am doing it… I am sorry.. I didn’t write anything about you.. (no wonder I never score in those 100 words para’s) but then … I could’nt stop describing your love…


And the bestest thing about having a perfect brother like you.. is that I can affornd making blunders… cuz… I know.. I have you… always..correcting me.. and crushing bones of all others who dare mess with me…

I dunno..
I love you… and that’s all I can say… : )

JUST READ IT....

(likhney ke baad realise kiya..this has no sense...but i guess next time onwards..i will actually write about something .. but hey this is my first..so cmon... padho bacho..)

Hmm… ok…12:46 am… shame on me…sitting in front of the pc… writing this… my bhai will kill me… yaar patiala janey sey pehley 3-4 ghantey daanta tha usney… NIKI PADHA KAR… TERA KUCH NHI HONA ITNI SEE PADHAI SEY

Toh abhi merey dimaag mey siwaaye uski daant key kuch aa toh raha nhi… toh socha issi baat par charcha kyun naa kee jai….

NIKI TERA KUCH NHI HONEY WAALA

Hmm… ok…so niki is this dhakkan… who does everything except what actually needs to be done… but hey I do study… bas… I dunno…apna toh meter hey..issey jayyada gaadi chalti hee nhi… hmm…

Aaj newspaper padha… 92% PERCENT RISE IN 90%ters… hhmm… sabse pehle..ALL HAIL THE GREAT ONES…. But mera toh soch key hee band baj jaata hey… yaar… naa mera padhai mey dimaag hey…naa kahi aur…bas mujhe sey toh baatey karwa lo.. hey na…

But then.. I know I won’t crack iit … but then I do think I can bake some yumm chocolate cake…better than some super-intelligent southi… I mean.. ok..no racism…love you southies..but heeh aa…no one can beat my choco cake…
But then..kya cake banao…jeevan bhar… yaar… darr lagta hey… fail hui toh suicide kar lena hey..(JOKING…JOKING…)
Yaar..can’t let parent’s down…. Upper sey agar pehley sey pata ho ki loser ho..toh banda kya karey… yeah..maybe I can sell pasta’s… om sweets par they sell those macaroni dums for 100 bucks…LOOTEREY…
Nahi toh …maybe I can kill little pesky kids on contracts… this world needs to be rescued from little monsters… :o….
Waise…how about being the brand ambasader of ‘useless mindless creature..’ darn..look at the trash am talking about… ok ok…kill me.. I guess I should stop typing..and start studying…or maybe sleep…lets see..omg omg… I see the sand man.. gotta go… I guess a huge chocolate cake is waiting for me in my dream…

By the way… what do you think you will be… or niki will be..or I dunno obama will be.. ok ok .. cut the cheese…I just want you to leave a comment…so write something…NOW